FRIENDSHIP AND RELATIONSHIP WITH FRIENDS

• What was your first impression of your future friend?
  • Why do you like him/her?
  • What things do you have in common?
  • What are the main features of his/her character?
  • What activities/hobbies is s/he keen on?
  • What don’t you like in him/her?

Read the statements about a real friend. Which ones do you agree with?

1. Among friends all things are common.
2. A friend to all is a friend to none.
3. A friend in need is a friend indeed.
4. A man is known by the company he keeps.
5. Friendship cannot stand always on one side.
6. A broken friendship may be soldered, but will never sound
7. ‘A real friend is a person who likes and dislikes the same things’.
8. ‘A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out’.
9. ‘A real friend is a person, who does not envy you when you have won,
10. but is really proud of you and your victory’.
11. ‘A real friend can only be a person who you know for a long time’.
12. You shall judge of a man by his foes as well as by his friends. (J. Conrad)
13. When Zeno was asked what a friend is, he replied, “Another I”. (Diogenes)
14. A friend is a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him I may think aloud… (R. W. Emerson)
15. The more we love our friends, the less we flatter them. (J. B. P. Moliere)

Answer the questions.

1. How and by what criteria do men (women) choose friends?
2. How do the issues of power and competition affect friendship?
3. Can frequent disagreements and arguments result in the break of friendship?
4. Has your friendship ever been affected by financial problems?
5. Do you think that men and women can be friends?
6. Can people of different age be friends?
7. What do you look for in a friendship?
8. Do you think it’s necessary for friends to be on a par financially, professionally and otherwise?
9. Could you live without friends?
10. Is it wise to keep making new friends?

How important is friendship for you?

To my mind friendship is a priceless gift given to people. The people who have friends are really lucky and happy. Our friends make our life interesting and enjoyable. Friendship is a special thing. When you are happy you share your happiness with your best friend. When you are in trouble you ask your friend help and advice, you can rely on him. In my opinion real friends are people who take care of each other and treat their friends the same way they would like to be treated. When you have no friends you became unsociable, unhappy and lonely.

Can you rely on your best friend? Why (not)?

Yes, of course. I think that I'm a happy person because I've got a real friend. I can rely on him/her at any moment. They say "A friend in need is a friend indeed". I know it for sure because there were many situations when your friend proved to be a true friend. I can share everything and treat him/her like my brother/sister. He/She is a special person for me and I'm glad I've met such a trustworthy person in my life.

What can you advise a person who has no friends?

It's difficult to live without friends. You are alone and your life is boring and unhappy. You need to make friends with somebody. Try to find a person who shares your interests. Spend more time together to make the friendship grow and become stronger. There is nothing like laughing and smiling to bring people together. Be helpful. Remember that everybody wants to feel secure and confident in friendship and sometimes needs a shoulder to cry on. Never let other people tell bad things about your friend. If you have any misunderstanding, solve your problems right away without sharpening the situation. And at last, treat your friend the way you want to be treated.

They say: "a person has just only one true friend". What do you think about this?

A person can have a lot of friends. But there is always only one person who is dear to you, with whom you can share secrets and tell about your problems. And that is your real friend. Only he will help you in difficult moments and share your joy sincerely.

WHAT TYPES OF FRIENDSHIP DO YOU KNOW?

Women are friends, when they totally love and support each other and bare to each other the secrets of their souls, and run to help each other, and tell harsh truths to each other when harsh truths must be told.

I believe friendship serves many different functions, meets different needs and ranges from soul sisters to casual playmates.

Consider these varieties of friendship:

1. Convenience friends. These are women with whom, if our paths weren’t crossing all the time, we’d have no particular reason to be friends: a next-door neighbour, the mother of one of our children’s closest friend and so on.

Convenience friends are convenient indeed. They’ll lend us their silverware for a party. They’ll drive our kids to soccer when we are sick. They’ll take us to pick up our car when we need a lift to the garage. They’ll take even our cats when we go on vacation. As we will for them. But we don’t, with convenience friends, ever come too close or tell too much; we maintain emotional distance.

2. Special-interest friends. Their value lies in some interest jointly shared. And so we may have an office friend or a yoga friend or a tennis friend. My playmate is a shopping friend, a woman of marvelous taste, a woman who knows exactly where to buy what.
3. Historical friends. We all have a friend who has known us since childhood. The years have gone by and we’ve gone separate ways and we’ve little in common now, but we’re still an intimate part of each other’s past.
4. Crossroads friends. Like historical friends, our crossroads friends are important for what was – for the friendship we shared at some past time of life. A time, perhaps, when we roomed in college together. Crossroads friends forge links strong enough to endure with not much more contact than once-a-year letter at Christmas and out of respect for what we once shared, we will always be friends.
5. Men who are friends – I must mention man–woman friendship too. For these friendships can be just as close and as dear as those that we form with women.
6. There are medium friends, and pretty good friends, and very good friends indeed, and these friendships are defined by their level of intimacy and what we reveal at each of these levels.

The best of friends, I still believe, totally love and support and trust each other, and bare to each other the secrets of their souls, and run to help each other, and tell harsh truths to each other when they must be told. But we needn’t agree about everything to tolerate each other’s point of view. To accept without judgement. To give and to take without ever keeping score. And to be there, as I am for them and as they are for me, to comfort our sorrows, to celebrate our joys.